i'm not sure anymore..

Wat it is world

It's dead week here at UK, so it's alot of studying goin on around here for finals. ughh :/

Soo guess who texted me last nite.. :( Tylar

She says hey Terrell...i'm like WTFFFFFFF LEAVE ME ALONE!!!! i'm tired of this bullshit, ARE U FREAKIN CRAZY!! quit playin with my emotions. I'VE HAD ENOUGH!!!

so i txt her back n say "wussup?"..lol

she says studying and stuff and I told her I'm doing the same. I told her i was surprised she texted me because she said she wasn't going to speak to me anymore. she said yea true,but there was reason behind that because of something that happened.

I'm like okk wat happened?..she says "i walked into class and i seen this girl talking to you on fb chat. and there was lots of hears and smiley faces and what not. i was just mad. then i think shegave you her number or you asked for it. IDK. it just made me mad"

I was like wow, ok the girl she prolly talkin bout is a friend. i don't talk to anybody but Tylar. I was kinda upset, so i replied telling her that she was just a friend and that girl is ONCE AGAIN my bestfriends lil boo thang, because they been talking since first semester.

So she says its koo, i understand now.

I don't know what it to do anymore. I guess we back to being koo again, idk. I'm just lost..ughh :(

SMH!!!

tell me why me and my bros got robbed..sumbody took his laptop, and my 360 out his dorm!! he locked the door but nobody broke in. its crazzzyyyyy I swear. Freshman year is crazy, too much for me to handle right now.

i lost a gurl, my 360, I dont know what to do.

It's not the end of the world so im all good, ive been in tougher, deeper, and more stressful situations.

just gotta pray about it and wake up tomorrow and hope all of this is will ease back into place :)

Really!? :(

I always do a random look at Tylar's profile on Facebook. It's just a habit(lol). Soo, Yesterday I come to find out that she deleted me as a friend on Facebook. I'm just sitting here like "wow, really!?".

I Tell my friends and they say "mannn fukk her, I told she was gon play yo ass once again. because its obvious she lying about this whole situation".

Real Talk I'm gon just leave it how it is. This is what she wants, and I'm not gonna force her back to me if she dosen't want me. I'm gonna give her some time to talk to some other dudes because she lost a good one :). Welp i guess i gotta let my baby go. If she comes back she was always mine, If not she never was

College Life..like WTF!

wussup world?

Now as you can see, me and tylar were on good terms :). We fell asleep into each other arms, i felt like i had the world in my hands. Nothing could compare to what we had at that time. Although, this were things get a little crazy.

About a week or 2 later I sent her a txt. She replies saying she's mad at me. I ask her "why?" and she says because "You're still talking to Tamika". Soo this is the issue between Tamika and Tylar. They were once best friends, but then they fell off and the beginning of the year. They were supposed to be roommates and stuff, but i don't know what happened between them. I was really cool with Tamika, but this was before i even knew Tylar and her had any beef. I was married on facebook to Tamika only as a friend though. It was just a joke, just for fun. Tylar gets upset and calls me out on it while we were arguing.

She said she was mad at me because she thought i was still talking to her. At this point me and Tamika had already "divorced". Not only does Tamika likes my best friend. She divorced me because she got mad at him. So, Im sitting here explaining to Tylar what this whole situation is about and pouring out my feelings to her. Then she brings up how she saw us "flirting" in the club. First off, i danced with Tamika maybe once, or twice. Then she used me a "boyfriend" to get away from this dude that was trying to talk to her. After a while I'm just talking to her and expressing my feelings to her and she just cuts me off. :/

The next day I'm hurt and lost because I didn't do anything. I'm working out and relieving my stress then I get a txt msg...from Tylar. She says "imy but im still upset"

I reply "i miss u more :("

Then we get back on good terms and doing great, texting each other and thinkin bout each other all the time. Lifes good right now

Then yesterday I get a random txt from her.. "she says "well i just found some shyt out! In a weird way. soooo this will be the last time I talk to you"..i'm sitting here like wtf..wat are you talking about. she says "it involves another girl, thats all im gonna say. I'll let you go". At this point im highly confused in my head like wat the hell is goin on. She never tells me the gurls name or anything. She just tells me she gonna let me go and she never wants to talk to me again.

Im highly upset right now because my gurl just leaves me out of nowhere and i'm sittin here lost. because im not fukkin no other gurl, but her. Everybody on campus knows that i talk to her. I'm just confused on this situation, Because ONCE AGAIN I didn't do anything.

I'm tired of this roller coaster ride and I need to get off. Getting my feelings hurt 3 times is not cool. I wanna leave her, but i really love this gurl. My friends say why you get back with her? somebody who hurts you once is bound to do it again. I guess they were right. I was tryna end this school year on good terms with her.

Maybe its not meant for us to be. Maybe she never really cared about me, like i care about her. maybe I'm just her security blanket, somebody to run back to. I can't take this anymore, because right now I'm just confused on what love is :(